Is the Internet steam-powered?

I am sooooo fed up with being on dialup!
When I first moved back to Ireland last year I thought that it would not be such a pain in the behind to get broadband.
OK, so I do not live in the center of Dublin. So what! If the North of this island can have 99% broadband coverage why is it so hard?
I initially settled on satellite broadband because it was the only short term solution. I choose Aramiska as provider because I had dealt with them before and they had been around for years making it a safe bet in my opinion. Even though it took a few weeks before they installed the big feck of disk on the side of the house and another week or so of tweaking before the system worked correctly I was happy as Larry.
The connection fluctuated around a respectable 2Mbps down and half a meg up.
Sweet....
Then after a few months I suddenly receive an email notifying me that Aramiska is seizing operations and the network would be shut down in 2 hours from the time this email was sent.
WTF!?
And that was it. Not a bit was coming down the pipe. I put my ear to the disk and there was absolute silence.....
Over the coming weeks I resorted to not using Internet access at home and just availing of the DSL line in the office. I was inundated with calls from ISP's that had somehow gotten their grubby hands on Aramiska's customer database and that all wanted to sell me a broadband connection. None of them where of course able to supply it where I lived.
Wankers...
Then, good news!
Aramiska's assets and network were bought by a new owner and revived under the brilliantly chosen name "OURANUS".
The new owners where French of course!
So I was back on the broadband wagon and the bits & bytes where flowing freely again. I was only slightly worried about the fact that these ouranus lads had not contacted me or requested me to sign a new subscription agreement.
So I was happily surfing away for another few months when suddenly my connection went completely dead again. Obviously I was straight on the phone to the your-anus people only to be informed that I had been disconnected because I hadn't paid my invoice. I explained to them that this might have been due tot he fact that they hadn't sent me an invoice. The friendly lady explained that that was OK (?) but that I still had to pay it before they could reconnect me.
I then asked her to send me:

1. a contract
2. an invoice
3. bank details for payment

I think that she mis-understood me when she said "yes, thank you and goodbye" and hung up...
And that's it, in spite of several phone calls and emails I have not received any of the above so I do not know how much I should pay, where to send the money or what I am paying for.
Ooh yes, and in case I forgot to mention; i'm back on fecking dailup!
It's fecking despicable, the government is spending €500k on a "broadband awareness campaign" and I (and I am sure I am not the only one) can't even get decent affordable broadband. Bunch of fecking kettle-heads!

E.